


encounters of the fake plant kind

by feyluke



Series: 5sos shadowhunter au [5]
Category: 5 Seconds of Summer (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Gen, M/M, Parabatai, Plants, Pre-Relationship, Shadowhunter AU, this is borderline crack lmao
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-09
Updated: 2016-06-09
Packaged: 2018-07-13 23:48:41
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,182
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7143491
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/feyluke/pseuds/feyluke
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>luke doesn't understand fake plants.</p>
            </blockquote>





	encounters of the fake plant kind

**Author's Note:**

> context: at one point i sent cay an email saying: “luke doesn’t understand fake plants” and this is the product of that

the first time luke sees a fake plant, that he remembers, he’s in a superstore with jack.

he’s fourteen and it’s 11pm on a tuesday in june and they’re tracking a rogue vampire who’s decided to stop for a detour to shop for shower curtains. jack taps his shoulder in three quick successions and they silently split up.

luke passes an entire aisle of potted green leafy plants and instinctively pauses to touch one of the leaves, a silent greeting. it feels wrong, and he stops, inspecting the plant closer. he looks at the other plants, and they’re all the same, dead and void of life. plastic. 

it feels like standing in a room full of mannequins, and he moves on quickly, disturbed.

 

the second (and third, and fourth, and on) time luke sees a fake plant, he’s at calum’s house, visiting for the first time. (he jumps slightly in alarm, but don’t tell michael.)

it’s right there in the entrance – a tall wannabe baby maple. the air around it is stale and unmoving. a layer of dust covers the leaves. 

luke stares at it as though it’s a pathetic, hateful thing, crinkling the one side of his nose. this time, at least, he’s prepared and knows better than to try and say hello or clean off the dust. he rushes past it, following calum up to his room. they haven’t been friends very long, and luke is grateful calum didn’t seem to notice and think he was even weirder.

luke quickly learns that calum’s mom is a big believer in “low-maintenance plants,” with a fake potted flower spread here and there throughout the house, and takes to climbing in through calum’s bedroom window when he visits. he brings a small cactus (a real low maintenance plant that calum won’t manage to kill) and puts it on calum’s dresser.

calum gives the cactus a strange look at first, but shrugs and names it “bobby.”

 

after being exposed to the strange museum of fake plant life that calum lives in, luke encounters his first fake christmas tree. it’s a month later and calum asks him and michael to help decorate for christmas.

the imposter evergreen lays on the floor in its opened box, separated into 3 pieces and wrapped up with string. luke stares at it, disgust and incredulity curling distorting his face, and michael laughs when he notices.

“you are honestly such a faerie,” michael says to luke and he and calum bend down to pull the bottom of the tree out. “c’mon, grab the top part and help us out.”

luke picks the top piece by one of the branches and watches michael and calum piece the bottom and middle together. michael points to the space where the middle and top connect. “right here. line it up. that’s it..”

“you’re so gross,” luke mumbles, slotting the top piece into place and stepping back to wipe his hands on his pants.

“what’s your problem with this shhh-stuff, anyway?” calum asks, catching the curse right as his mom enters the living room. His mom beams at luke and michael, and she and calum start separating the branches. michael finds the lights and starts untangling them, while luke stands off to the side, his arms folded defensively.

“it’s just…weird. i don’t get it. what’s the point?”

calum shrugs. “would you rather we cut down a living tree and let it die slowly in our house for a few weeks and dress it up for the festivities?”

luke exhales sharply. “that’s disgusting.”

“well that’s why we have a fake tree, then,” calum smiles.

calum’s mom smiles strangely (“he’s a hippie mom, don’t worry about it,” calum whispers, “i told you, he’s never had a christmas”) and points to some other boxes.

“you can start getting the ornaments ready, luke,” she says, and he’s grateful to be given something to do.

 

luke thinks he’ll get used to the plants eventually, but they still manage to make his skin crawl, particularly if he wasn’t expecting to see one.

it’s an april morning after a long night of unsuccessful demon hunting (he’s got bruises lining his entire left side and ashton has cuts will probably need medical attention) and ashton pulls him into a vegan coffee shop.

it’s nice, luke thinks, that ashton thinks of these things, without even seeming to. when luke’s out with michael and calum they’ll go to regular places and that’s fine, but luke never knows what to eat. vegan places feel safer.

ashton flops into the booth while luke gingerly sits down across from him. “you should probably watch yourself, or you’ll bleed through your bandages,” luke warns.

“i’m not too worried about it,” ashton says, making his voice low and gruff.

luke doesn’t even have time to think of a response before he sees a fake orchid in the corner of his eye a few feet away from them. he knows he jumps and does a double take and inwardly groans when ashton looks over at the plant.

“is there a tiny little evil sprite hiding in the leaves of that orchid?” ashton asks, stifling a laugh.

luke wants to shut down and avoid talking about it. michael, being a warlock, understood luke’s reaction to plants without having to have it explained. calum knows much less about their world, but is receptive and accepting, eager to learn anything that luke and michael tell him. he was easy to explain the plant aversion to. 

luke’s not sure how ashton will react; if he’ll think less of luke as a shadowhunter. he thinks of niall – who doesn’t give two shits about plants, whether they’re fake or not – and briefly wishes he could be like her.

he clears his throat and tries, though: “you know how humans get freaked out by mannequins?”

“yeah i don’t get that,” ashton begins. he looks as if he’s about to ridicule people who dislike mannequins, but something clicks and he closes his mouth. “oh, alright.”

“it..makes me uncomfortable. they kind of scare me,” luke admits. he knows he’s grimacing and tries to relax his face. “it’s like.. you think it’s a plant. but then it’s not. and it’s really disorienting.”

ashton picks at the corner of his menu. his face is serious and contemplative, the expression he gets when he’s about to tell a story and also when he’s trying not to laugh. “i used to go out with this human girl, and whenever we went shopping, she would literally do a double take at some of the clothing mannequins and be all shaky and freaked out. i thought she was being silly but i learned really quickly that laughing at her wasn’t a good reaction.”

“if you laugh at me i’ll punch you,” luke warns.

“i won’t laugh at you,” ashton smiles. “never in a mean way, anyway.”

luke wants to make some sort of joking response but his throat closes up. he ducks his head and tries to focus on the menu instead. ashton calls over the waitress and asks to have the plant moved.


End file.
